Monday, November 8, 2010

In the dark

In the dark you can think about things. You can think about life in particular, or you can think about how to get out of the dark. The darkness tracks you down, covers you, and you have to fight to stay calm. You can feel the walls much up around you; you can taste the blood in your throat from screaming. You can also feel the blood ooze its way out of the cut he gave you. You feel scared; you're not supposed to handle this. You are only four years old. You weren't supposed to see your mom leave you, or your father beat you endlessly. But you did anyways. You can pretend there is a whole other world, where everything is perfect. But it will come crashing down in the dark. Because there's no one to pretend for. When someone is watching you like he had, you know you can fight your way out of it. But when no one's watching, you fail. In the dark, it makes you accept many things. Being unloved, unwanted and you have no reason to live. And it's just those things that make you fight for it.
Just to see the light.

?????

There's no combination of words I could put on the back of a postcard. No song I could sing, but I can try for your heart. Our dreams, and they are made out of real things like a shoebox of photographs With sepia tone loving love is the answer. At least for most of the questions in my heart like why are we here? And where do we go? And how come it's so hard? It's not always easy and sometimes life can be deceiving. I'll tell you one thing it's always better when we're together.